How to Find Joy Without Letting Your Environment Decide

How to Find Joy Without Letting Your Environment Decide - Photo by D Jonez on Unsplash

Have you ever noticed how often we get stuck in patterns of thinking that don’t serve us? Sometimes, we hit a wall, obsessing over something that just won’t happen, simply because our mindset is trapped. It could be the people around us, the culture we grew up in, or even the education we received. All these things can go against what we truly want.

Let’s say freedom is important to you, or maybe you’re sensitive to bad news or negativity. If you’re surrounded by people who judge easily or carry a negative vibe, even if they don’t speak to you directly, it can distract you. You won’t be fully focused on what matters. Imagine going to the library to study or write, but you feel the eyes of others on you. Your attention is split. The same thing happens when you walk outside in a t-shirt and shorts on a cold day and feel people staring at you. In some places, like France or Belgium, I’ve felt those looks. Once, at a McDonald’s, I left my tray on the table and immediately heard people whispering and making remarks. In the UK, no one would care. There, everyone minds their own business. Why waste time criticizing others when you could focus on yourself and grow?

This difference in attitude is huge. When you feel constantly judged or watched, it affects your mind. Living in Sydney now, I can dress how I want without feeling those stares. Sometimes, you just sense when people are watching you, but here, it never happens. In other countries, it does, and it throws you off balance. If you’re sensitive, this can be a big deal.

The tray incident is just a small example, but it shows how the environment can impact you. If you find that a place, a country, or a culture doesn’t support you or bring out your best, you have choices. You can try to create your ideal life by inviting positive influences virtually—through podcasts, webinars, audiobooks. I have plenty of audiobooks on my phone, and I’m always learning. This is like inviting good people into your life, even if they’re not physically present.

But sometimes, that’s not enough. Sometimes, you need to take a bigger step—move somewhere new, even if just for a month. Try it for three or four weeks. Often, it’s worth it. You can make a list of pros and cons, write it all down, and see what really matters to you.

How to Find Joy Without Letting Your Environment Decide - Photo by Marija Zaric on Unsplash

Of course, it’s not always easy. Maybe your family is important, or your partner can’t move, or you have kids. But even for children, a better environment can mean a better future. If you know your current situation isn’t right for you, it’s likely not right for them either. Better to fix the problem sooner than wait and hope things will magically improve. Usually, nothing changes unless you act.

If you keep doing what you’ve always done, don’t expect a different result. If your surroundings get worse, your life will feel heavier, even suffocating. It’s like a sinking ship. Life is short. Three years spent unhappy are three years lost forever. Money comes and goes, but time only goes. You can always make more money, but you can’t get back lost time. Every minute counts, and once it’s gone, it’s gone for good.

So, it’s always better to take action, even if it’s expensive or difficult, than to just endure a life you don’t like. Enduring is just another way of wasting your life. Everything is possible if you truly want it. If it becomes your top priority, you’ll do whatever it takes to change. When something is your number one priority, everything else comes second.

Ask yourself: is comfort your top priority, or is it a new, different life? Sometimes, you have to get uncomfortable in the short term for a better long-term outcome. Keep questioning yourself, keep adjusting, and dare to try. I know it’s not easy, but you have to accept that. There’s always a better way to do things.

You will never be able to back up or restore the time of your life. Once you lose a day, it’s gone forever.

— Pierre

If you keep doing what you’ve always done, don’t expect a different result.

— Pierre

How to Find Joy Without Letting Your Environment Decide - Photo by Katja Anokhina on Unsplash

Key Takeaways

• Your environment shapes your mindset more than you think.
• If you feel judged or unsupported, it’s okay to seek a new place or new influences.
• Taking action is always better than waiting for things to change on their own.
• Time is your most precious resource—don’t waste it living a life you don’t enjoy.
• Make your happiness your top priority and be willing to get uncomfortable for it.

Reflection

• Are you letting your surroundings dictate your happiness?
• What’s stopping you from making a change?
• Is comfort holding you back from a better life?